Monday, December 03, 2007

Drink Vigilantes

When it's just me doing the beverage service on the one-flight-attendant plane, I go row by row. But when there's two FAs, we utilize what I alone am dorky enough to call the 4-12 Technique, wherein we go to the fourth row and work outwards for four rows, and then go to row 12 and repeat the process. It's a solid plan, I assure you, and ensures even drink coverage for all passengers, though it momentarily leaves rows one through four and nine through 12 unserved. The people in one through four are usually cool about it, I think because if you're in the first row and we don't stop there, you assume we're starting in the back. But sometimes someone in nine through 12 will ding us to tell me that I skipped all these people. Now I know, I know, they're just standing up for their fellow passengers, and I appreciate that. But they're also implying that I'm a moron. I admit that I am addled enough to miss one row. But if I skip four rows, a passenger has to see that it's merely part of a grand design, one that if they really thought about, they may still never understand. So shut up already, you'll get your drink eventually.
Or it could be that before, I was whining about passengers who don't pay attention, and now that I've got my wish, I don't want it. Again, pay no attention to the bitter flight attendant.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Yes, sir, I know--they shorted us on drinks and we have to serve sparingly." L.M.

8:45 AM  
Blogger nicardo1 said...

"Thank you for your concern, but those passengers are being punished for various reasons. Too many carry on bags, seat belts not securely fastened, didn't listen closely enough to my safety speech, taking too much time in the lav, poor hygiene etc. If you feel excessively guilty by being served a refreshing beverage before these rows ahead of you I can come back later when all we have left is tonic water and grapefruit juice. 'Kay? BUH-bye."

7:58 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home