Faster Than A Speeding Slow Thing!

Today, on a lunchbox trip to Sun Valley (where Harrison Ford and a bunch of self-absorbed ski people live), a guy tried to get on the plane with an ATM-sized carry-on bag. That's funny enough to try on the jet, but on the lunchbox it's just ridiculous, so I took it from him and told him I'd stash it in the cargo hold, which was a lie... I hand it out the door to a ramper (since I'm not allowed to leave the plane when there are people on it), and he puts it in the cargo hold. Now there's no rush on this process, because boarding people are slow, which was why I was so surprised to see this lantern-jawed ramper dash over to the bag and me, leaving contrails across the ramp. It was only when he turned around to streak away with the bag that I saw TURBO emblazoned on the back of his neon-green safety vest.