Since the dawn of man, all humans have known someone who had a friend who was a flight attendant. Here, now, I am that friend.Preparation Game
About one week left, and lots to do.
Got the study packet in the mail. The class is about a month long, and because it's so short (despite the threat of 12 hour days), there are things I have to know by the time I get there. Lots of acronyms, definitions, and the pre-departure speeches. There are certain collections of words that are just part of the collective consciousness by now... the Miranda warning, the marriage recitatation, the Lord's Prayer, and of course, the pre-departure speech. Everybody knows that one... the seatbelt thing, the oxygen mask thing, the upright tray table thing. But there's nothing like having to learn something that makes you forget you know it. Not to mention that there are several versions of it, depending on which model aircraft I'm supposed to be in (something vaguely unsettling about describing a plane I'll be in using the words 'model aircraft'). There'll be a test on the first day, and if I fail it, I come right back home.
Like the man says, no pressure.
Assembling all the items I'll need as well. Lots of copies of birth certificates and driver's licenses. Applying for a passport (because some flights go into Canadia). And something that looks like it might be amusing is the 'six required items' list. On this list are things that you have to have every day in class, all the time. One is a flashlight, one of those two AA jobs. I'm imagining being right in the middle of a class and one of the instructors suddenly dives at me, howling, "PRODUCE YOUR FLASHLIGHT!"
I am working on my quickdraw.
Got the study packet in the mail. The class is about a month long, and because it's so short (despite the threat of 12 hour days), there are things I have to know by the time I get there. Lots of acronyms, definitions, and the pre-departure speeches. There are certain collections of words that are just part of the collective consciousness by now... the Miranda warning, the marriage recitatation, the Lord's Prayer, and of course, the pre-departure speech. Everybody knows that one... the seatbelt thing, the oxygen mask thing, the upright tray table thing. But there's nothing like having to learn something that makes you forget you know it. Not to mention that there are several versions of it, depending on which model aircraft I'm supposed to be in (something vaguely unsettling about describing a plane I'll be in using the words 'model aircraft'). There'll be a test on the first day, and if I fail it, I come right back home.
Like the man says, no pressure.
Assembling all the items I'll need as well. Lots of copies of birth certificates and driver's licenses. Applying for a passport (because some flights go into Canadia). And something that looks like it might be amusing is the 'six required items' list. On this list are things that you have to have every day in class, all the time. One is a flashlight, one of those two AA jobs. I'm imagining being right in the middle of a class and one of the instructors suddenly dives at me, howling, "PRODUCE YOUR FLASHLIGHT!"
I am working on my quickdraw.
posted by Phil at 11:29 AM
2 Comments:
Holy crap! You're becoming a flight attendant! That sounds like a LOT of fun! Take care and keep in touch and all that.
don't they realize that airplanes have windows? besides if there ever is a time that you need to use the flashlight, I think there will be enough flames to see by. Anyway, good luck.
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